Jack. Thanks!. Taking Mac to the Movies

Jan. 15th 2010, 6:06PM CMT BGKY

Loca­tion: Great Escape cin­e­ma. Sub-sec­tion: Screen #2: Alvin and the Chip­munks: The Squeakquel

Before I say any­more, I again give a hearty thanks to Chuck and Pam for weath­er­ing the ini­tial, tantru­mic storms when Jack­son was brought home, and Mac and Scar­lett real­ized he was here to stay. They (Chuck and Pam) went beyond the call of duty and did real yeo­man’s work.1 Hat’s off.

And lest I for­get, my folks2 soon came after­wards and took the brunt of anoth­er blast of sib­ling anx­i­ety3 and were able to give Jenn the much need­ed help with the Bataan-Death-March-like feed­ings new­borns demand. How­ev­er, even Jack is try­ing to do his part: the kid is lit­er­al­ly only sleep­ing, poo­ing and wak­ing up4 every 34 hours to eat in such clock­work fash­ion that much like Kant, we locals can set our watch­es to his ruminations.

At night (and dur­ing most of the day too) I am of no help, maybe wak­ing up enough to roll over so that Jack­son can be placed in my arm for Jenn to fin­ish pump­ing, and stay­ing up long enough so she can take him out of my comatose clutch­es and fin­ish burp­ing and clean­ing him, chang­ing his dia­pers and putting him back to sleep.

So, today, this evening, I decide to take Mac to the movies. He had got­ten an Alvin the Chip­munk fig­urine from McDon­ald’s so he seemed to want to see a movies about them but it was a bit of a bust. He spent the first ten min­utes play­ing with the the­ater seat, bounc­ing it up and down and then walk­ing up and down the stairs but then found the con­ces­sion stand more inter­est­ing than the movie.5 So over the next 40 min­utes, we got up four times to get Twiz­zlers, Sour­Worms, Pop­Corm, Mag­ic­Dot Ice Cream6 and final­ly we gave up and left halfway through the movie. I noticed that a few min­utes lat­er, anoth­er Dad with four, young kids also left, so I was glad to know it was not just us.

Oh. I have to go, Mac is ask­ing, “You want to talk in my bed for a lit­tle while?”

-Ger­ar­do 7:22pm

  1. pro­nounced “yo-man” []
  2. I also don’t want to ignore the con­tri­bu­tions of my broth­er Ivan and his wife, Lau­ra, who helped with some back­ground oper­a­tions that allowed my par­ents to come down to help. []
  3. Mac is sur­pris­ing­ly gen­tle and sweet to his new bro; I sus­pect this is because (A.) it has been made exceed­ing clear to him and (B.) his fac­ul­ties have devel­oped enough to under­stand that if he were treat Jack in any way like he is cur­rent­ly treat­ing Scar­lett, he would suf­fer most griev­ous time-outs. Scar­lett on the oth­er hand has­n’t quite real­ized that Jack is not one of her dolls and so, while well mean­ing, she is kept a close watch on in case she acci­den­tal­ly man­han­dles and squish­es Jack.

    How­ev­er they both are clear­ly not total­ly com­fort­able with The New Guy, because Scar­lett has been wak­ing at three or four in the morn­ing with a cry­ing jag that is only soothed by some rock­ing to be done at a set cadence and only to be done in her room; she brooks no weasel­ly behav­ior like try­ing to bring her back to our bed so we both can get need­ed sleep. As for Mac, he has become even hard­er to put to bed than before. Until recent­ly, tak­ing him up his room, read­ing a book with him and singing the ABCs was enough for him to say good­night and plop off to sleep. Now I am hav­ing to engage him in extend­ed dis­course on what he did at pre-school that day, doing decon­struc­tive read­ings of his bed­time books.

    We now spend many a night pour­ing over the tome: Fif­teen Ani­mals! where all the ani­mals are named “Bob” and so while Mac innate­ly grasps the Descrip­tive The­o­ry of Prop­er names as espoused by Bertrand Rus­sell, we will inad­ver­tent­ly get ham­strung on some Wittgen­steinian word­play and BANG! Just like that, Mac has delayed his bed­time by yet anoth­er half hour. Not only does he quick­ly sub­vert any tricks but he makes it clear that you are aban­don­ing him to his lone­ly fate every time you go away—He will nev­er give you per­mis­sion to leave, nev­er let you know that he is not per­ma­nent­ly scarred by your das­tard­ly self­ish actions. []
  4. no inex­plic­a­ble col­icky cry­ing episodes []
  5. Which is either a very strange movie or I just don’t remem­ber what kids movies are like because it seems to be aimed at a pre-teen/kid­die mar­ket but the movie takes place in high school with all the usu­al high-school tropes that seem bizarre or down­right inap­pro­pri­ate, eg they show one of the chip­munks, on their first day of school, get­ting a “swirlie”—dunking a rook­ie’s head in a toi­let and flush­ing it. []
  6. which tast­ed like chilled col­ored sug­ar []